Malaysia Flight MH370 Was Hijacked By Vladimir Putin, Because Underpants Gnomes

There’s a New York Magazine piece suggesting that MH370 was hijacked and flown to Kazakhstan, likely to an air strip leased by Russia.

All it requires to get there is assuming that data suggesting the plane went somewhere else must have been faked, and once you ignore it you can plot a path that could get you there.

One of the commenters on my blog had learned that the compartment on 777s called the electronics-and-equipment bay, or E/E bay, can be accessed via a hatch in the front of the first-class cabin.15 If perpetrators got in there, a long shot, they would have access to equipment that could be used to change the BFO value of its satellite transmissions. They could even take over the flight controls.

Once you learn that “there were three ethnically Russian men aboard MH370” it’s obvious! But why was it hijacked and taken to Kazakhstan?

Because Vladimir Putin is a really bad guy, and…

Maybe he wanted to demonstrate to the United States, which had imposed the first punitive sanctions on Russia the day before, that he could hurt the West and its allies anywhere in the world. Maybe what he was really after were the secrets of one of the plane’s passengers. Maybe there was something strategically crucial in the hold. Or maybe he wanted the plane to show up unexpectedly somewhere someday, packed with explosives.

Suggesting Putin did it to show he was powerful, while not taking the credit, makes no sense. Besides, nuclear weapons.

And what would he need the plane for, packing it with explosives, because Russia has an air force. And civilian airlines. He could just buy a Boeing 777, or a Tupolov.

Not saying the plane couldn’t be where the article suggests, I think it’s less likely than not, but the Putin stuff is just off the rails.

To suggest it was unclaimed payback for sanctions imposed the day before but that he must have been plotting for months to make it happen with such precision, defies credulity.

MH370 is one of the great mysteries of aviation at this point, which will continue to generate theories and speculation. But seeing posts coming through my Facebook feed suggesting this particular theory is ‘80% likely’… I just don’t believe that level of confidence is warranted, at least without first knowing how the underpants gnomes intend to use the underwear they steal.

About Gary Leff

Gary Leff is one of the foremost experts in the field of miles, points, and frequent business travel - a topic he has covered since 2002. Co-founder of frequent flyer community, emcee of the Freddie Awards, and named one of the "World's Top Travel Experts" by Conde' Nast Traveler (2010-Present) Gary has been a guest on most major news media, profiled in several top print publications, and published broadly on the topic of consumer loyalty. More About Gary »

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  1. I wish I could say I’m surprised that the NYT’ would publish a piece of wild conjecture blaming Putin/Russia for Malaysia Air 370. They have merely become the PR dept of the U.S. government.

    The U.S. State Dept and NATO were hoping to find a credible link between the lost flight and Putin (even if they discovered that Putin/Russia weren’t involved). They couldn’t so they basically dropped the issue. It’s a good thing that the NYT has taken up the mantle of demonizing Putin/Russia.

  2. Adventures in missing the point? The title of the article includes “Am I crazy…” and the article contains the key answer to that question: “My gut still tells me I’m right, but my brain knows better than to trust my gut.”

  3. Whatever the culprit, the disappearance benefited Putin by bumping the invasion of Ukraine to the #2 story, and reducing public pressure to take a hard line on it. I vaguely considered the better theory that Russia orchestrated it as a diversion to distract the media, but even that is so unlikely, as the value of the distraction is far less than the cost if Russia were caught and labeled as a sponsor of international airline terrorism at the same time as an invader of its neighbors.

  4. Amazes me the conspiracy theories people come up with when in its most likely at the bottom of the Indian Ocean. Fact that it hasn’t been found is testament to how deep and how remote parts of the ocean are.

    Anyways there is the case of MH17, where it’s quite obvious what happened. Want to blame Putin and Russia for something, that would be the much easier choice.

  5. My biggest concern is the perfect storm of things that would have to come together to throw off that satellite analysis. I’ve been around airplanes for a long time and wouldn’t have had the first clue as to how to how one would have come across that knowledge about tracks, aircraft types, avionics manufacturers, and location of avionics bays. That’s not common knowledge. Remember, the mere existence of satellite handshakes were something that didn’t come out for a couple of days. And then how would you find a party interested in that information without setting off intelligence alarms?

  6. Figure out which ONE WORLD partner airline had to give up the most frequent flyers mileage from that flight and you will find who’s responsible.

    Follow the miles!!!!!

  7. carl sagan said it best in “cosmos”:

    “observation – couldn’t see a thing. conclusion – dinosaurs!”

  8. I would bet there are individuals that KNOW exactly where MH370 Is……and the bottom of the Indian Ocean is not one of them. In Today’s highly sophisticated surveillance (military and space) You do NOT simply lose track of an aircraft. Someone, Somewhere KNOWS Something……and I am LOOKING at You, Washington. (I wasn’t born Last Night to think Otherwise)

  9. I had this theory a while back. A few countries have the technical capability and the resources to pull this off. Russia is one of them. Remember the timing. MH370 disappeared when Russia first went into Ukraine. The MH370 news took over the media for almost a month. That much media focus time off the Ukraine invasion. Well worth the investment.

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